Adventures in Filing

Day 1

Charlotte brings the folders to his desk. Two stacks, about a foot and a half high.

Day 2

Look at those stacks!

Day 3

He stacks the manila folders. Mostly 47000s and 48000s, with the odd 45000, a few 46000s. One 43457. Now there are five stacks.

Day 4

All right, 43457, it’s time to send you home. He picks up the folder and brings it back to the storage closet. 45003-45997, 44408-44499, 44001-44449, 39501-39998… and 39002-39499! There you go! He opens the box and flips through, and deposits his folder. He’s one fifth of the way through with his job.

Day 5

Look at those stacks!

Day 8

Pop the box together. The tight solidity of the cardboard sliding together flush into a rectangular cube is very satisfying. Onto the drawers. 46002-46048, 46502-46099, all the way up to 46498, it all goes into the box. Into the storage closet. Now the fat sharpie, to make 46002-46498 an official storage box, and to get high. Again he considers whether he should order purple sharpies. Would that affect the high?

Day 9

He grabs a cluster of green hanging file folders and repositions them in the drawer. Now there’s room for his manila folders. In they go. Wait a minute, 46880, you don’t go with the 48000s! Disaster averted! File, damn you! File!

Day 10

Down to one stack. Look at that stack!

Editor’s Note: While this story is loosely based on true events, I changed the name of my co-worker Chi to Charlotte, to preserve her anonymity. Also, the numbers have been altered slightly, and there are really two stacks remaining, one stacked perpendicularly atop the other. I was filing the 47000s when the idea of “Adventures in Filing,” occurred to me, so I had to stop everything to satisfy The Muse. Welcome to meta-fiction bitches! Are you reading about filing or are you reading about reading about writing about filing? Where is reality now? File that!
–Dan Kilian
Adventures in Solitaire
Dialogue With The Loch Ness Monster


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